While moving things around in the hall closet to make room for more things, I found a piece of mouse poop on top of a shelf in there. I quickly pulled everything that was on the floor out of the closet and vacuumed. I figured while I was in there, I'd do some tidying up, as a lot of stuff was just piled on top of other things in a plastic box. Before I began, Mom took me to Target and bought me three plastic containers that had lids because two of the containers that I had didn't have lids, and I needed a third because I had so much stuff.
When I began sorting out things, I noticed that there was mouse poop on one of my costumes, the feet of Amaterasu (Okami). My mom had me get a pair of gloves and take the plastic bin with everything in it into the garage. Knowing that I would have to throw a majority of it out, I fought back tears as I walked down the hall to the garage. I found a face mask (normally used during spray painting or heavy sanding) to protect myself from the toxins in mouse urine, and prepared to start digging through the box, but I couldn't hold back anymore. I cried like a baby.
My Amaterasu cosplay was the first big project that I threw myself at. I spent months working nearly every day on it because I wanted it to be the absolute best that it could be. Even though it ended up flawed, I loved it dearly. It was the first costume that I seriously competed in, it opened up the world of competing in cosplay for me. (Something that I still take fairly lightly, but seriously enough to put a lot more effort into my costumes.)
Amaterasu was officially retired because I wasn't satisfied with my craftsmanship or the overall look. I didn't even want to sell it because I've grown far enough in cosplay that I didn't like the overall look of my Amaterasu cosplay enough to take someone's money for it. However, it was still mine and I loved it dearly. Occasionally I'd see it in its box when I opened my cosplay closet for something, and I'd recall fond memories of wearing it. Amaterasu always got a great response.
I sat and cried by myself for a while, but I couldn't pull myself together enough to do anything. I sent my boyfriend a text message (he was in the living room at the time) to come into the garage. He did a wonderful job of comforting me. He got me calm enough to talk, and I tried to explain why I got so upset. He said he understood. I'm not entirely sure that he did, because I know it's silly to cry over a costume that I hadn't worn for two years, but I think he understood enough, otherwise there's no way he would have been so patient with me. I seriously felt like my dog had just died or something (not a joke because Amaterasu is a wolf, I seriously felt like that).
I finally accepted the fact that I wasn't going to be able to completely pull myself together, and I also knew that I wasn't going to be able to throw any of it away myself. So I began sorting through the box while my boyfriend went to get a pair of gloves for himself so that he could throw it out for me. I saved a few things that didn't have any mouse poop or urine on them, including the shield, the fan, and Issun. I separated everything into two piles, "keep" and "garbage", and threw all of the garbage things back into the plastic bin. I sobbed some more, threw out my gloves, gave my sanding mask to my boyfriend, and left the garage so that I didn't have to watch him carry the box out to the garbage bins.
|The Great Painter Issun|
Now in necklace form
Rest in peace Amaterasu (Okami) cosplay
You will be dearly missed
06/23/09 - 06/23/12
06/23/09 - 06/23/12